Subject: Manchester United Virus



Everybody please watch out for the following viruses ...

The Manchester United Virus ... This is where your PC thinks its far
superior than any other PC and develops a memory disorder, forgetting
anything that happened before 1993.

The Christiano Ronaldo Virus ... This affects newer PC's mainly. The
computer looks great, all the lights are on, but nothing works.

The Roy Keane Virus ... This one is particularly nasty and will throw
you out of Windows ...

The Alex Ferguson Virus ... The computer develops a continuous
whining noise and the on screen clock runs a lot faster or slower
(depending
on how your days been), than all the other computers in the building.

The Tim Howard Virus .... This one's not particularly harmful -
but you just can't save anything.

The Neville Bros. Virus ..... Just when you think things can't get
any worse, this one pops up and causes a calamitous error.

The Ryan Giggs Virus ... The computer develops a processor problem,
whereby it thinks it's better than it actually is. It also
experiences dramatic fluctuation in performance.

The Kleberson Virus ... This is a particularly ugly one.

The Manchester United Shirt Virus... This one is especially hard to
detect as it changes it's format every 3 months