right i sorted it.

non of the plugins above worked. honestly, sound soap was just not what i was looking for and a bit shitty to be fair, one of those waves x plugs were wicked for digital distortion btw (but not what i needed on this occasion), and as for adobe audition WHAT A LOAD OF PAP. whoever wrote on some forum i found that this was the titties, is in fact, a big tit himself.

at first i thought it was pretty much the whole top end but i slowly figured out in the end the main probs were actually coming from a selection of freqs around about 3-4khz, the real harsh freq band which make you want to hit old grannies. awful area of sound to have to deal with but i shaped the eq around about that point using 2 lots of waves q10 plugins (you wanted to see the damn thing hehehe) and then hard limited the mid-hi freqs with a nice multibander to flatten it all out nicely.

now i'm happy

no seriously like, if anyone knows anything extra about this topic, please feel free to add your own solutions ;)