Well, it comes down to finding people who you connect to and who share the same attitude.
It took me ages to find someone who looked into the music and considered the people on the floor in the same way I do. When I finally found that person it just clicked and went from strength to strength. We pushed off each other and focussed on the same ideals and goals with the parties etc. I play LivePA not DJ so it may be different....i dont know?? The dude running this gig, Simon Slieker, liked where I was coming from and liked my sound. He put me on one night and I gave it my best, knowing that at least someone appreciated what i did. it worked and he kept getting me to play. From that others also got me to play as they had heard my stuff and seen my unique technique. This further allowed me to hone in on my sound and get better. Within a year i was able to get on a net-based label and release some stuff. A small start but a progression none the less. This is purely for helping me to push myself to do better tracks and learn more about the music. I also realise that if I want to be able to travel to meet people and have parties with them then i need to have some kind of momentum behind me so that i can get the opportunities. I am not fussed about the money side of it, I just want to perform and have adventures, get better and find out more.

If you can find someone to push off it makes you play better and find more energy which then makes you come across with a better impact and hence get noticed or picked up for other gigs. Its best not to push for gigs too hard lest you end up working for twats who dont have a clue what they are doing or even care about what they are doing. This makes you hate it and lose hope and can often work against your image etc. Does the scene no good and lowers the quality overall.

Find a reasonably establish crew who you align with and can talk to easily. The break will happen automatically because the energy feeds itself and pushes you all up.

I just kept going to gigs and introducing myself and talking and handing out demos. i tried to be straight forward and myself as much as I could. If I got a connection, good. If not, no loss I kept trying. I keep trying, it never ends as things change all the time.