It`s all about EQ, and then other bits such as compression.

a kick drum takes up specific frequencies in the mix, therefore the kick needs some room in those frequencies to "fit" into the mix, so you need to pull down other levels sitting in the same place within the mix.
Your problem is also compounded by the fact you are using distorted drum loops. Distortion acts like compression, and reduces the dynamic range, and increases apparent size of a sound.

Subtractive EQ will sort this out mostly. Then other things such as compression will tweak it up.