This is interesting. A bit different.
I think sonically its mostly there.. Everything seems to be a bit centered though. Maybe try panning some elements out a bit or spreading overall sound ranges out to be a bit wider.
I would also give a bit more top end to the kick to cut through the mix a little more as it sounds a bit muted right now. Also try turning down the volume real low and seeing what, if any, elements seem to jump out more than others. This could help balance out the mid-top end a bit as I think a few of the elements are louder than others and causing it to sound a little lopsided groove-wise.
Good start though. ;)