k...
first impressions..

bass is far too loose.. seriously needs tightning up.
everything is far too stereo wide IMO - there doesnt seem to be any middle stereo field
the bell that comes in is way too loud and theres a horrible resonance off it that hurts the ears.
theres a weird filtered edit @ 2:15 that doesnt sit well and misses the beat slightly when coming back in.
its very loopy and just meanders along without going anywhere.

overall its not as bad as im making out (this forum is for help so theres no point in me saying "yeah..its ok" and thats it)
you're obviously going in the right direction in terms of production.. it certainly doesnt sound like a beginner.. just not as polished as an experienced producer.

you need to work on your arrangements and sculpting your sounds.

can i ask what monitors you use? its just that bottom end is very very muddy and im wondering why. do you cut your bass below 70/80khz? do you compress it properly?

hope you dont get offended by this but like i said this part of the forum is for help... if you eventually get into the releases section then the praise comes ;)