I remember randomly DJing a night at Templars in Nottingham (no shit) with FilthyDave last year.

A load of blinged up nodders turned up, and one of them...

A. Tried to crack on to my girlfriend, after telling her how much he hated his own girlfriend. (Winner).

B. Asked me if I was going to be playing anything "good" soon.

I asked "like what?"...

He said "not this"...

I told him he was free to leave if he didn't like the music.

He said he'd payed £3 to get in.

I directed him to the bouncers for a refund.

Didn't see him again.